“A hypocrite is by far worse than a liar because they exercise and live a lie versus just being compulsive.” –Zakiya Dada
Sometimes we’re wrong about people. We’re wrong about their intentions, aspirations, dreams, and who they are altogether. That’s a scary feeling. I’m frightened because everyday someone is giving their heart and their all to another being, with hopes of gaining the same in return. But typically what they gain in return is heartache and emptiness.
Why is it so hard and complicated for honesty to exist within a person? Did Voltaire prophesy corruption and suffering back then? These questions are often present throughout heartfelt and loving relationships. Humans are so complex and indescribable that sadly we will never know a persons true colors.
Our lives are too short to have our heart thrown in our faces over and over, while others continue to stomp all over them.
Recent situations have led me to believe that most significant others become crutches during relationships. Doing so much and getting nothing in return, but if you stop, they fall short and struggle. But of course that is no type of condition you want a loved one to endure. Therefore, you pick up the slack and remain faithful, and they remain dirty because they’re self assured you will stick around and clean up their mess. After all, they’re holding your heart in the palm of their hands.
Not attacking any particular sex or gender because people are people. I don’t believe a male does any more or less than a woman when the truth lacks.
A few days ago I was led to the thought: “Ff a person has never been loved, then they may not know how to love. “ How so? Well, if a males’ mother didn’t give him attention while running into her own relationship problems, she may have never given him affection as a child. So, in his relationships he doesn’t know affection or compassion for that matter, because he is so used to seeing his mother out of place, cursing, and fighting males. What hope would he have in relationships if he seen his mother in that state of mind at such a young age? The same goes for females as children. It’s sad but true. Even more bereaved that cases like these happen regularly.
It’s understood that we can’t expect a fairy-tail or daydream relationship with a partner. But is it too surreal to want a trustworthy, honest, compassionate, affectionate and real love with someone who feels the same? Problems and disagreements will occur, but honesty and communication helps with the building.
Occasionally, there are those relationships that come along to teach you a valuable lesson, usually helps you figure out what you want or even better who you are. If only we knew that from the start, then we could save time, money, energy and parts of our lives that we wish we hadn’t shared.
At times we have to wakeup and understand the difference between someone genuinely loving us, or someone wanting us out of convenience. Simply put, if you don’t want to be faithful and honest in a relationship, don’t be in one. Some people are that desperate because of their upbringing that they desire companionship. But they were never taught to give it back.
In closing, I’m sacred for hearts. I’m scared for so many who give their all, 100 percent, their kind words, their genuine love, warm cooked meals, their time, energy, affection and honesty. Just to have it all crumpled, stomped, shoved, criticized and held for ransom by deceit. Meanwhile, the weak are still figuring out how to love…truthfully. HOTEP!